When All That Glitters is Pure Gold

I love the process of preparing for Advent.   At our church Advent preparations involved readying the sanctuary and fellowship spaces for Christmas, one week at a time, by the worship visuals team.

Decorations came out of storage and that meant lights and glitter. LOTS of glitter.  Everywhere. I love it!  I think it's awesome. It does not want to be vacuumed up. I'm okay with that.  

The other time glitter found its way into the carpet at our church is when our girls group, the GEMS (Girls Everywhere Meeting the Saviour used to meet.  I love it that there was evidence that our girls were in the building meeting their Saviour!!

Isn't life just like that sometimes?

The glitter on the carpet this month is evidence that we have prepared to celebrate His birth with our congregation. Ordinary carpet. Ordinary people. The hymn says, "Let every heart prepare Him room." Can the world tell that I've "prepared Him room"?  Does it show on the outside? Does it last past Christmas? We are a resurrection people but Lent and Easter still seem so far away. Does the regular wear and tear of life remove my shine? By Easter....months of vacuuming will have taken most of the glitter out of the carpet again.

It IS good to, consciously, go through this preparation each year during Advent.  To make room and bask in the presence of THE Light of the world. To be filled with, and changed for, comfort, joy, love, peace, and hope.  There is more to it than glitter that falls off an ornament, it's a reflection of gratitude.  We are not ordinary to God, we are valuable and precious.  So precious that He gave the dearest Gift.  Extraordinary in that we carry His image, His reflection.

So it's good to stand still.  Not just sing a carol in passing, but actually stop and think about it.  The preparing bringing with it gratitude and hope that clings...a reminder of the most precious Gift of all: a Saviour, Redeemer, Strong Defender, and Prince of Peace.  To remember that I have 10,000 reasons for my heart to sing. Let me be singing when the evening comes...even when it's hard.

I love things that remind me to remember!

Even when I vacuum!

Creating Hope

I've been enjoying the process of creating over the past few weeks.   Making little somethings to mail away, cards for work, a group, and notes of encouragement.   Some of the items were gone so quick that I didn't take a photo.  They're on their  way somewhere with a message.

Messages of hope, encouragement, to keep up the good work, and to look to God for help in the place where He has called.   Sometimes the message is for me...just as much as it for the recipient. 

Love those reminders!

And...I get to create and draw on that reflection of my Creator in me.

A line from the new Tenth Avenue North album "The Struggle" reminded me of that some weeks ago...when the sledding didn't feel so smooth.  "Beauty never intended to be more than a reflection".  It reminded me that sometimes we try so hard to be who we are...to make sure we carve out our identity, but really, we just have to reflect the Light that is inside of us.

I love to create. And I love to share what gives me Hope.   

A Lesson on Expectation

I'm ready for a trip. I'm ready to get out of here.  I sat down the other day to write.  I thought I was ready.  I had just had a really great conversation with two friends.   I love it when conversations give me something to think about.   It kick starts my thought process and often ends up in some kind of conclusion or at least helps a train of thought reach a destination.

So I sat down to write, ready to squeeze out the sponge that is my brain. All that came out were fragments that wouldn't come together.  Then I remembered...

There's no point to head out unless you're led out.  I have been loving my small group and realized that a couple of my last posts have come out of my "homework".  Maybe those are the steps that I'm supposed to take.  Maybe those are the weekly steps toward rest.

Rest is really a state of mind, I have discovered.   My hands can be busy and my mind be totally at rest...and vice versa.  Like when I found that rest might not look like sitting on the couch

So there is no rush.   In church just the other day, I heard it... "He leads me beside quiet waters.  He restores my soul." Rest itself is a journey and if He leads, then I will follow, knowing I'm on the right track....

That comforts me today.

Literally hours after I composed the post above....I read these words from A.W.Tozer, The Pursuit of God, (quoted in Crazy Love by Francis Chan). 

O God, I have tasted Thy goodness, and it has both satisfied me and made me thirsty for more. ...Show me Thy glory, I pray Thee, so that I may know Thee indeed.  Begin in mercy a new work of love within me.  Say to my soul, "Rise up my love, my fair one, and come away." Then give me grace to rise and follow Thee up from this misty lowland where I have wandered so long. 

Sometimes when you start to jot down the fragments, they look like individual steps, but when placed one in front of the other, they start to look a little bit like the start of a journey.

That gives me goosebumps.   

Slow Down

Nov 22 and I am outside in my t-shirt washing the flower pots to put them away for the season.  One little plant is thinking about blooming just one more time.  I just don't have the heart to toss it on the compost pile...yet. 

Today the simple act of washing the pots, in beautiful weather, is in itself a moment to slow down.  I didn't realize when I started how many memories would surface.   I love it when things remind me to remember!

The painted terra cotta pot reminded me of the Amazing Race I planned for one of Joe's birthdays when we drove around Strathroy, picked up a cell-pack of annuals and some pots at the Flower Ranch and went home to paint them. 

The cute lime green one was given to me by my friend PK. He loves plants. He's such a kind and nurturing friend to me. 

There is the pot that reminds me of the fun I used to have with friends, when we were young busy moms, setting up the craft room at the SCCS bazaar.  There is the pot from the door prize of  the LDCSS Curling Bonspiel.  In writing about it now, it reminds me how much I have loved my 3 year term on the LDCSS Board of Directors.  Then there is the one with the butterfly from my bestie.  And the white ones I bought in the white elephant room at the SCCS Bazaar for a steal, with the IKEA tags still on them. The steel pail from an outing to Winter Wheat in Sparta. The ivory porcelain pot from the little shop by the Huron County playhouse when I went with the ladies to see Vimy. The orchid pot from IKEA that has yet to see an orchid.  And the big blue ones from Canadian Tire just because I love the color.

So many good memories.  Good to take some time to slow down and remember. Pulling the brakes on the bus.  Stopping to contemplate while my hands are busy.  Stopping to contemplate that God is good.  

I guess I thought slowing my pace would look more like sitting on the couch. With a pen and paper. Maybe it means just enjoying the tasks that my hands find. Being in the moment rather than rushing out of it.   Capturing it and savoring it....just for a bit.

Restless

For a while I've been trying to think of how to explain the direction in which I'm headed.

Truth is, I'm not sure. But I have learned the hard way not to head out unless I'm led out.  Where I don't sense leading, I should probably stay put. It's hard for people to understand waiting, as if you have to be on your way somewhere all the time. 
While I stay put I need to rest.

Part of my rest has come in the form of my small group(s).  
Part of my rest means not taking on new things.  Even fun things.
Part of my rest is putting stuff away from the journeys and chapters in my life that are coming to a close.  That's just my personality....tying off loose ends and details.  But a lot of things have happened that leave a whole host of loose ends flapping in the wind. They are elusive and that makes me restless. Tying them up clears my head.  But sometimes you discover that some loose ends will not be tied and you have to let them go.  Release them... 

Restless.
Knowing the time to move has not arrived.

The things that happen in life have a way of making you re-evaluate..where you've been, where you are going, even if you want to keep going, and if so, if you want to keep doing things the way you've been doing them.  Ask yourself....so how's that working out?

What if the answer is..not so great?   

Part of my rest has to be doing those things that I know I need to do but am not finding time for. I have to start making time, mostly, just to be. I get so caught up in the things that press that I take myself away from the things that are important.   I remove myself from the contexts where I find rest and healing to meet deadlines. Using gifts and talents to meet needs while neglecting the state of my heart and my soul.  All of it urgent, and lately sacrificing my peace with my pace. The fragmented parts don't add up to a whole anymore.

I haven't had time to write or to make cards.  I haven't made time to respond to the nudges I feel.  Denying a part of who I was created to be.  Created for wholeness.

It has felt more like wandering that being on a journey. Maybe somewhere along the way we get caught up in the roles we carry out.  Even the roles of our callings. We know the direction in which we were going, but it got out of control like a train that is now barreling down the tracks without brakes.   Resting is a way of restoring the brakes and evaluating if I'm still on the right track.

So I guess that answers where I've been.
The next step is to see where I'm going...and I'm sure that'll get figured out as things slow down.

Last week I met one of my readers. So cool to know that my writing speaks to others.  To bless others as much as I am blessed. I long to get back to writing.  Slowing my pace to rediscover my peace.  Maybe losing momentum is really the best thing that could happen.  :)

You Can't Always Get What You Want....

...but if you try sometimes...well you might find... you get what you need.  -(Mick Jagger, Keith Richards)

Sometimes what I want is not the same as what I need.  Sometimes what I want is not even good for me...except, maybe, when it comes to chocolate mousse.

It is easy to lose sight of what I need.  Often I don't want to see the alternative...the thing that I need.

God always knows what I need and He patiently persists.  Sometimes in a drought, you wish for a deluge of rain and you almost miss the dew. 

He comes in the dew and covers you softly, gently, and completely.

When Morning Breaks....

My soul seems to go through seasons.(I know I do...I read my own blog sometimes and note the ups and downs!) Do you ever feel weary? Get discouraged? This season felt as if there was no end to it, and it felt very lonely.  

And then one day the fog lifts. After a particularly dark turbulent night, a big disappointment, I sense a new day dawning. Something brand new and good is around the corner. Weeping may last for a night but rejoicing comes with the morning. You can see and hear more clearly.  The day seems brighter.  You feel like yourself again.  So who am I when I'm not myself?

I may get discouraged but I don't lose hope.

• I posted entirely too many photos of my holiday up North.  But it's quicker to pore over my favourite favourites here than gaze at the entire photo album on my hard drive :)
• I wish you could see the trees on my street.  They're gorgeous. 
• I spent some time with good friends. A friend is someone who makes you feel good about yourself after you have spent time with them.  They nourish your soul. I hope you have friends like that!!
• My son is home from college for a weekend.   No wonder we feel complete again :)
• 3rd family reunion of 2012 coming up later this weekend.  Can't wait for the beautiful drive :) 
• Soooo much to thank God for today!!  
• I'm blessed and as Matt Redman would say: 
  

  Blessed be Your name
  When the sun's shining down on me
  When the world's 'all as it should be'
  Blessed be Your name
  
  Blessed be Your name
  On the road marked with suffering
  Though there's pain in the offering
  Blessed be Your name
  
  Every blessing You pour out
  I'll turn back to praise
  When the darkness closes in, Lord
  Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

The Serpentine Loop

 

My beloved and I went camping recently.  It was great to spend 5 days together.  Completely uninterupted.  Off the grid.  Above are a few(...okay maybe 20) glimpses that speak to the beauty up there...  And the quiet.

Green Stuff

The other day I noticed it again.

There are so many green things growing while your mind tells you these things should be dry and brown.    Yet, it's so green.   And because my mind tells me one thing, I often don't notice what my eyes see.  

The other day it was like I noticed it again for the first time.  The median and roadside on the 402 are awash with color...  The tomatoes in my garden are exploding.   

It's there.  I just don't always see it.

There are days when our hearts are heavy and our minds are full...preoccupied with wondering and trying to understand.    But goodness and growth are still happening all around us. 

God has a long, long arm.  (Num 11:23)  He is still planning and moving and orchestrating.  

Meanwhile Back at the Ranch...

 ...we had to take reno break to get the guest room ready for family!

And so I had to hang up some stars.  

We had such a lovely visit doing almost nothing.    A good time was had by all....

 ....and the weekend before that, we went to Chatham on Father's Day.    And saw more family! 

Such a nice day.... 

...and there were 7 wild baby bunnies in front of the neighbor's house....in a hole in the lawn.   And the sweet neighbor lined the hole with shavings.   

What you can't see is that the momma bunny moved the babies the next day.   Good mom. 

On The Outside

There is more going on at our house than just the obvious changes inside...

I had a rare day at home yesterday.
These are just a few glimpses of things  I love. 
Often seen, often photographed. 
Same stuff, different year...







My little baby basil have hatched.  Sweeeeetest little things!
 

We went paddling on Saturday.  It was wet and wonderful.  And we met some great new people.   I like people.

Raindrops on lilies. 
I like perennials because they just go ahead and get started without you.  You can always count on them.
They just show up.

I have friends like that too.

Real Renos

Being in the midst of a renovation has been an interesting experience.  There are many surprises hiding underneath perfectly good drywall and work needs to be done to bring it back up to code.  Strange and fascinating wiring configurations lurk just beneath the surface.  It gets the job done....most of the time.   Isn't life just like that sometimes?

When we got down to the bare studs in the kitchen, I thought about how much more there is to a person than just their outward appearance, their facade.    Very often we are content to just be squared up from a distance and taken at face value.   Some days I'm pleased that this is all that others see of me, as I'm whizzing by.   Upon closer examination they might notice that there are some areas that have a pretty poor spackling job that was painted over.   Then there are the spots that just have a nice picture hanging over something entirely unsightly.  And you know you really should be working on repairing that instead of avoiding it, walking around it. Carrying it.  

This happens.  To all of us.

There is something really scary about surrendering these parts of our lives and being vulnerable before God. To wake up one day and realize that just because this is the way it is, doesn't mean it should be.  To surrender these places and allow Him to do the uncomfortable, painful,  healing work that needs to be done.  To admit that His Master-plan is better than anything we could choose on our own. If we can allow Him to do transformational work in us...He will remove the fascinating and strange band-aids we've added to our lives. If we can let go of the things that aren't really working,  He will take us back down to the bare studs.   He will give us a new heart.  A heart of flesh.  Renew a right Spirit within in us.  Turn our mourning into dancing. Bestow on us a crown of beauty and a garment of praise and bring us back up to code: His plan for our lives.  Imagine the "before" and "after" of a life changed and renewed. 

The Light

There are days when the light flowing into the house is just right.  It illuminates. An ordinary object takes on marvelous qualities.

Isn't life just like that?

God takes ordinary people and when they allow themselves to be used by Him and infused with His Light...they shine...from within.     Ordinary people resembling their Maker and doing extraordinary things.   Even when the mountains shake all around them, and the waters roar.   God is in the midst of them.

Perseverance

I found this post in the archive, written last spring but it was never published.  Hmmm.  

Look at this beautiful tender little thing.   So lovely in all its purple-ness.   It wasn’t supposed to be….  There has been no sign of life in this little pot since I transplanted the little corms.  I had all but given up on it but couldn’t bring myself to toss it out.  

These two little pots were planted at the same time.   A friend gave me a hanging basket but I left it outside a little too long.  I knew the nights were getting colder and then one night it froze.   Many of the tender little plants perished but I knew these were a bit hardier than the rest. One year they bloomed in the garden after surviving the winter in the composter…I thought they were dead.  This time, I rescued them from the big pot, composted the excess soil, and replanted them in smaller pots to bring inside.   I planted them at the same time and kept the pots side by side on the window sill.   They received the same light, lived in the same temperature, and similar moisture….which can be sporadic at best in this house (Not all plants are compatible with that lifestyle). 

Occasionally the leaves die but the corm survives.  It can hibernate, I guess.  

This morning I saw these three little sprouts.   So small.  So timid.   The other one is so green, so lush and I’ve been enjoying its blooms for some time already.  Weeks, in fact.  It just goes to show that some plants need a little more time, patience and understanding than others.  And you can’t rush it.  You can’t make it grow.  You can want it all you want, but it will do it when it’s good and ready.   And in God’s time.  Isn’t life just like that sometimes?

God has a plan.   And you can’t make it happen.  He has a different plan for each person, likeHe did for each of these plants.   I got the exquisite joy of finding it today.  We all “bloom” at different times and under different conditions.   We have everything we need inside of us to become what God had planned before the foundations of the earth were laid.   And in His time we will bloom beautifully in the perfect spot.   And it will bring Him exquisite joy to watch us unfurl.  

NeedToBreathe

We saw NeedToBreathe on Saturday night at the Phoenix in Toronto.  One of two stops in Canada.  Sold out.
It was SUCH A GOOD SHOW!

Favorite tracks?

Loved their cover of "Folsom Prison Blues" and the unplugged version of "Slumber".  They played so many of my my favourites: "Something Beautiful", "Lay Em Down", "Washed in The Water", "Tennessee" (It was awesome live! really got the crowd going :), "Devil's Been Talkin'",  "A Place Only You Can Go"....

They played a lot of songs from the Reckoning and the Outsiders.  You could hear the crowd sing along, especially on the more acoustic songs, especially on "Slumber".  They finished that song without any amplification.  The entire room went absolutely silent in order to be able to hear them, and then slow began to stomp on the wood club floor and sing along. You could see how much the band loved that! Those moments are cool.   

Ben Rector opened and was one of the most fun opening bands I've ever seen...never having seen or heard him before.   He did a great cover of Whitney Houston's "I Wanna Dance With Somebody"...not reminiscent of the 80's at all.   So fun!

Going to Toronto on our own was such a fun full day outing. Such a deep breath. A reprieve. Swallowed up by the masses and yet completely alone with each other.  For an entire day without anyone noticing.   Anticipating it for weeks..and then, just like that, it's over.   And you just have the sweet memories.

I am playing these two albums back to back all day long.   Not tired of them.

At all.

Something Fun

I thought I'd post reno photos on my new second blog, SugarToo.

Let's see how long it takes before you find it!  :)

Keeping It Up

I find that most days it takes some effort to be positive.  It is quite easy to be negative, I think it is a default position in many people.  Once in a while that really discourages me.   A couple of low blows can fell anyone I suppose, but it always takes me by surprise when it happens to me.

The people around you will almost always mirror what they see in you, and so...being positive has great consequences.    It's amazing what you learn when you have a room full of toddlers in your daycare :) 

This week I read a devotional about "being the aroma of Christ".   2 Cor 2:15 is one of my favourite passages.  I want to be a pleasing fragrance to God and I'm supposed to bring that fragrance to the world.  There are certain ways I must carry myself if I want to glorify God in that way. It sound like it's all about me....it's sooo not.   But then again, maybe it is.   Why do I get so discouraged when other members of the body of Christ behave badly and  ungracious.  It makes me wonder why I feel like I have to try so hard, and other people get to walk around just being...themselves?   Everyone experiences disappointment, unmet expectations, and times when life just doesn't go their way.   Everyone needs compassion. And none of us have a monopoly on Grace or Mercy.  A friend reminded me the other day that "cynicism is from the devil".  Blunt.

2 Cor 2:15 reminds me that it isn't about me. (Phew!) It's about living for the audience of One, and about being obedient.   It's about taking daily vitamins that provide stamina: surrounding myself visually with the Life sustaining Word, I don't bind it on my forehead or on my door post but I do write it on file folders, cubicle wall, and key-chain.  And I listen to music that reminds me of the unfailing promises of God's presence, power and righteous right hand.  And...I continue to be thankful for the good people God puts on my path.   I seek them out and hear the words that God might be speaking through them, to my heart and to my soul. And I make cards and I make muffins.....(look out when I start baking!)

It's about focusing what I'm called to do, instead of focusing on the circumstances around me.  I'm called to be the "aroma" in spite of what is going on around me, and maybe, especially when things "smell less than fresh" around me. I can't change people or their outlook on life, but I can maintain mine. If I look down, I'm going to start sinking.  In the meantime, I can take shelter in the refuge His wings, I can look up to hills because that's where my help is going to come from.  That...I think...is looking on the bright side! 

Random Bits of Life

I was surprised to find that  45 photos downloaded just now.   One of the boys needed shoe photos for an art project.   I loved the random collection that I found, and am glad for the moments I went back into the house to get the camera because I saw something I loved. Simple things.  Simple moments.  Breathtaking moments.   If I blink, I miss these moments...

• Ray went for a run and I went for the sunset.
• I love the delicate curl.
• You know I love that place.
• I couldn't scrape those flowers away without capturing them first.
• I couldn't protect my bleeding hearts from the killing frost.  Beautiful, but deadly.
• I promised "befores"...I'm packing AND emptying random cupboards.
• Apparently my refrigerator is not frost free.    Reminds me of Superman's fortress of solitude.
• ...and then there are those shoes.