Don't They know It's October?

 The other day I looked out into the garden and saw this crazy riot of color.  There are hundreds of blooms in my garden and I did everything wrong when I planted these seeds:  It was late in the season, I didn't water them, and I didn't pay close attention to their light requirements.

Don't they know that it's October!!!  Other plants in the garden are looking scraggly and are losing their leaves....they're reacting to the colder weather and shorter days, following their natural cycle.  

Getting back to the plant analogy from a post or two ago I looked out and thought to myself: "Wow, what kind of plant do I have to be to look like that!!?"  

As soon as I said it I realized that I don't get to choose what kind of plant I want to be.  God has created me and predetermined who I would be, complete with His wonderful plans and purposes for me.    But do I have a part in choosing to bloom, or even how I bloom,  where I am planted?

This week's lesson for my small group Bible study will cover the parable of the sower.   I know....how fitting, right?   In it, the sower sows the seed and the seed falls in different places.  I have to believe that the sower wills it that way and that the seed doesn't have a lot of say.     The job of a seed is simply to grow despite its circumstances, and in spite of  the weather conditions, and to trust that the sower has prepared a place where it will thrive.

Today I am facing a disappointment.   I feel like I'm giving/ it's taking a lot of the energy.    The circumstance in which I find myself will not change, but how I deal with it, is completely up to me. Do I give in to discouragement and let my countenance droop, or do I lift my face toward His radiant light and let Him do his thing.   I have to trust that He will sustain me...like that tree in Jeremiah 17 "...It does not fear when heat comes: its leaves are always green.  It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit...."

I want to be part of a crazy riot of color in my spot.    I want other plants to wonder why I'm not packing it in to prepare for winter but just bloom with reckless abandon.    Not hiding that I have disappointments but simply choosing NOT to dwell on them.  Hanging onto the promises because they will not fail.  Especially when it feels like October.....

I'm reading my Bible-In-A-Year.  Occasionally I get a few days behind, but I'm trying to stay on track.   The readings are from Jeremiah right now...and yesterdays' section was from Jeremiah 31....  These are pieces that I love.   "I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving kindness.  I will build you up again. ...For the LORD will ransom and redeem Jacob...   They will be like a well-waterd garden and they will sorrow no more.  They will turn their mourning into gladness;  I will give them comfort and joy instead of sorrow."  And from Jeremiah 32 "...Is anything to hard for me?  I will rejoice in doing them good and will assuredly plant them in this land with all my heart and soul."

Quick additional comment- Thanks Jannette for your comment!    This morning at Coffee Break we talked about God's Word taking root in our hearts.    THAT is what sustains us....in spite of what goes on around us.   The Word is the seed....and it has a lot to say :)

And I thought I would link up with Beki at The Rusted Chain for "Finger Print Friday".

Something About Sam....

I'm trying to figure it out. Trying to understand why I feel such a profound sense of loss and why it moves me so deeply.  A restlessness.  And today I realized that it stems from my need to compartmentalize things in order to file them away.  It's how I process things and this blog is often a way to digest things in my mind....to think something through and understand it.   And then I share it here. Maybe somewhere along the way...an insight might help someone else. 

Sam Bos was remembered at my son's school this morning.  He would have turned 15 today and we celebrated the place he had in the lives of his schoolmates and school community.  Then we gathered outside the school and released balloons after praying together and were invited to release our cares to the Lord.

As a mom, I didn't know Sam personally.   He was a 9th grader in the life of my 9th grader.  But when I was 17, a fellow 17 year old in my life died.   I lost a classmate, a friend I went to youth group with, went to Young People rallies with, drank an occasional beer with....   I know that kind of loss.    I hugged his mom and dad at his visitation.  They loved it that we came as friends to share in their loss.   I went to his funeral.  And I saw his mom and dad continue to grieve.  It seems like they stayed sad for the rest of their lives.  I know that life goes on but that it's never the same.

When I was 26 or so, a 26 year old girlfriend of mine died.  She was in a car accident the day after Joe was born.   I couldn't go to the visitation and I couldn't attend her funeral.   She was a really strong believer and her testimony was all about being here on earth until God's work for her was done.  That changed how I looked at life.

Today I found it hard to believe that Sam's work on earth was done.   But at the memorial service I heard what an impact Sam's life had on his classmates and how his faith was something he lived out, and how his positive nature and smile could always lift someone's spirit. That work is still going on, even though he is no longer physically here.    He is not gone, just somewhere else.   How does losing someone like that change those who occupy the space where he was?  15 and already leaving a legacy.

Part of my struggle has been to regain the perspective of what is important in life.   In the grand scheme of things the work I do with my hands has so little importance.  It is the heart and spirit that I pour into it that makes the difference.  If I'm no longer doing it for the right reasons then maybe it's time to move on.  Maybe.  Maybe not.   Maybe it's time to adjust the motive.

I can rest in the shadow of His Wings until the disaster passes.    I can cry out to God Most High, who fulfills His purpose for me.  He sends from heaven and saves me...God sends His Love and His faithfulness.  My heart is steadfast.  Great is His Love, reaching to the heavens: His Faithfulness to the skies.  Pieces of Psalm 57

So excuse me while I adjust.  It might take some time.   I'm trying to rediscover the importance and significance in the things I do and say.  I want the people in my world to be just as rocked by this as I am.  I want them to be rocked to change and not be satisfied with just getting by...

What will you do with the time that's left? - Mark Schultz

A favorite blog ended with this quote today:
 
This is the beginning of a new day. You have been given this day to use as you will. You can waste it or use it for good. What you do today is important because you are exchanging a day of your life for it. When tomorrow comes, this day will be gone forever; in its place is something that you have left behind…let it be something good. Author Unknown.

It's Not Easy Being Green

When I drive my eyes occasionally drift over to what's growing on the side of the road.  Our area of Ontario experienced some really hot dry weather this summer and I was amazed at how many green things were still growing along the roadside in the middle of August.  I thought there should be dead yellow and brown grass. Instead I saw a lot of green:  bull-rushes, goldenrod, loose-strife, asters...  The lush green grass of Spring may be gone but that`s only because it has finished its cycle.    My bleeding heart plant gives it up around the beginning of August if I`ve watered it faithfully.  And then I just saw it off at the ground.  Same with the poppy, spider-wort, etc...  These plants are Spring`s first signs of  life but they are short lived.     Then there are plants that need a longer season to grow.   Like corn they need the heat units of summer and don`t show their spectacular blooms until the fall and carry on with reckless abandon until the frost finishes them.  

Often when we imagine growth in ourselves and in the world around us, we expect lushness and greenness, that "other side of the fence" kind of greenness. We expect that growth will follow a pattern.  Sometimes we need to stretch and challenge ourselves, and God gives strength and courage for us to follow His Leading.   But often we experience growth after spending time in the wilderness.

Rarely do we get to choose how we will grow or in which season we will do our growing.  In my experience, God has more to say about that than I do.    Yet when we allow God to do His Work in us, we will grow, we will bloom and we will produce the seed that He needs us to share with the world.